Monday, October 15

Phs from my instagram.

Its all about time, at the end its all going to be about time-- when I'll coming back to that beautiful place again. The streets lights that blinding me at nights, the sunny-day-but-cold-wind-blows at days and the beautiful foggy morning scene you could see on the rooftop room. I am typically not a person who would love a new place, I am typically not a person who would love to learn something that's complicated. I hate complicated things. But this time is different, its a whole new world to me but my legs didn't shakes even an inch. Oh well, lets say I need to start thinking of ways to keep survives in that world, lets say I need to start to let my tongue speaks another new words and accent. And lets say I need to keep myself ready in just few years before I'm starting to throw myself up there. I should really need to get myself ready and start focusing in one dot. Sigh. There would be a change in the air soon, and sigh sigh sigh again that I need to get used to vegetarian food and seafood-- which obviously I have to avoid because I'm allergic to them. So what should I do to increase my metabolic rate naturally? Or do I just need to be mentally prepared that finding other food than veges and seafoods wouldn't be easy but yeah its still not impossible to survive.

My head almost cracked thinking that I only have less than 6 years to be prepared but my heart aches that I need to wait up to 6 years to come back to that place. Imagining-- I was walking early, and working well into the afternoon, and attending classes right after that, well into the night, and then I'd get home and try to remember something interesting that had happened during the day, or the week, or the month so I'd have something to write about, and I'd write until midnight, or sometimes, later, well into the morning, and I'd hardly ever sleep, and it was busy often stressful, and it was detached often lonesome, but by god, was it the best time of my life. Everything in my head is so perfect right now that I thought I've accidentally took a few pills that can make me feel so high right now. I'm so weird tonight.

Oh well whatevs, I'll start preparing for now. Autumn in SK for a few days are enough to make me feel longing and empty and ecstatic at the same time. Its just perfect. A few more years, just a few more years, as a decorador. That will do.